The Brand Called ‘YOU’
A few years ago, in a marketing class, we were asked to develop a marketing plan using ourselves as the brand. While I made an ‘A’ grade in that paper I did wonder what the Professor was thinking - asking us to be our own brand. When I read over the paper in later years, I understood that he wanted us to identify our own individuality and uniqueness, and also, be able to position ourselves strongly in this world. As I have developed over the years, I notice how unsettling it is for me to be anything other than myself.
Embracing your authentic self is one of the most empowering decisions you can make. Being authentic means staying true to your values, beliefs, and feelings, rather than trying to conform to others’ expectations. It’s about presenting your genuine self in all situations, whether in relationships, at work, or in your personal life.
If you grew up in the environment I did, it’s an environment of conformity. For “my people”, if you’re anything other than the norm, there’ll be conversations about you. Acceptance and embracing uniqueness is not our strongest suit. Today more than ever, the pressure for us to fit into certain molds or meet external expectations makes it challenging to stay true to who you are. People have opinions about what they think you should do or be and yet they have not applied the same principle to their own lives.
I love how my family members believe they have studied me down to science - even though I have not spent so many years with them as an adult and the majority of my childhood was also spent in boarding school. For instance, when I order for clothes to be made for me in Ghana, and, the seamstress chooses to sew something she thinks I would like, my cousins will tell her straight up that “she will not wear this” and like clock work, as soon as I see it, I tell the designer to give it away as I won’t wear it.
A contractor learned the hardest lesson when he was remodeling my bathroom. He thought he would impress me by picking some tiles with designs in it and my mother had told him that “Abena will not like these tiles.” The contractor told my mom that those tiles are modern designs and that’s what “everyone” is using now. He went ahead to tile up the entire bathroom to impress me. My mom allowed him to because she wanted him to learn a thing or two about me. As soon as he was done, they called me on FaceTime and when I saw the tiles, I politely told him to remove them from the walls and redo them with a plain design as I had initially ordered. My folks were smiling in the background and for good reason. I heard my elder sister tell him that “we told you so.” I mean, just because that is what “everyone” uses does not mean I will use that.
Listen, I know very well I have my own ways and approach about things and it’s perfectly OK. The Bible reveals in Psalm 139:14 (NIV) how God intentionally created each of us in a wonderful and unique way;
"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
Being authentic means recognizing and appreciating your individual self - talents, skills, quirks, and even imperfections, all as part of God's wonderful creation. When you live, fully aligned with your true self, you exude confidence and inner peace, attracting genuine relationships and opportunities that honor who you truly are. When you’re authentic, you’re more comfortable and confident, which allows your true qualities to shine through. This level of honesty also encourages others to be real and vulnerable, creating a more meaningful and honest environment.
My prayer for you this week is that you will never forget that you don’t need to conform to anyone’s standards to be valuable. Especially if those standards do not increase you or sew seeds of excellence in your life. Your authenticity is a reflection of God's incredible work in you. Celebrate the things that make your personality unique. Live boldly, and trust that you are exactly who you are meant to be - fearfully and wonderfully made. Embrace life long learning and excellence to be better each day but my golly - stay true to your brand.
XOXO,
Lady Abena.
Cultivate Your Space
Proverbs 4:23 AMPC
“Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.”
I don’t think we ponder over this as much as we should but your atmosphere shapes your destiny believe it or not. One of my mentors who has transformed my life and understanding of God in the last five (5) years, Apostle Joshua Selman, on several occasions will release a prayer that “may God change your audience” and we all shout “AMEN!”
That prayer plus the scripture above is a reinforcement that the environment we keep, in order words, what we allow into our hearts and minds, ultimately shapes our character and destiny. Whether it's our physical surroundings, the people we spend time with, or the mental and spiritual atmosphere we create, these elements influence our thoughts, attitudes, and our destiny.
A positive and faith-filled atmosphere can inspire confidence, foster peace, and open doors to opportunities that align with God's plan for our lives. Conversely, negative or draining environments can hinder growth and steer us away from our purpose. That’s why it’s crucial to deliberately cultivate a space that uplifts and empowers us. We have to be intentional to create a space that is filled with faith, hope, and love so that we can be rightly positioned for divine guidance and success. Remember, your space isn’t just your physical environment; it’s also your mindset and spiritual focus.
I pray for you this week that the Lord will empower you to create an atmosphere that brings out His glory in your life daily. “Clean house” - your mind, body and soul and watch the beauty, peace and success that unfolds in your life. Let this be so and so it is in Jesus’ name. AMEN.
XOXO,
Lady Abena.
What Will You Give Me?
This past week my spirit was heavy - bouncing off a lot of emotions and this verse in Genesis 15:2 kept ringing in my mind. In fact, I repeated it out loud several times and yes I was asking God that question - really.
Genesis 15:2 (KJV)
“And Abram said, Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and the steward of my house is this Eliezer of Damascus?”
This scripture is a true reflection on when promises meet pain. This single, blunt question from Abram cuts straight to the heart of what it means to live with a promise that hasn’t yet become reality. God had promised Abram descendants, land, and blessing and the bible recounts that Abram had indeed received almost all the promises except the descendants. Abram had no lack whatsoever and for some of us, we would have stopped right there and be thankful for life all day long but not for Abram. God had returned in Genesis 15:2 to re-affirm His promises to Abram and Abram’s immediate response was not a confident “Amen,” but a vulnerable, pointed question: “What will you give me?” He names the painful fact he is childless and the practical consequence: his servant, Eliezer, stands to inherit all that God has blessed him (Abram) with. That honest question he poses to God opens the way for one of the most important exchanges in Scripture about faith, promise, and God’s character.
Rather than rebuking Abram for doubt, God responds (in the verses that follow) by reaffirming the promise: that Abram’s own offspring would be as numerous as the stars. That response leads to a pivotal theological moment: Abram believes in God, and “his faith was counted to him as righteousness” (Genesis 15:6). The story doesn’t erase Abram’s doubt; it frames that doubt within the larger story of God’s faithfulness.
Here are three (3) lessons from Abram’s question:
- Honesty with God is not disqualifying:
Abram speaks plainly about his pain and the practical implications of his situation. The Bible models prayer that names confusion, fear, anger, and grief. God does not require that we hide our doubts. In Abram’s honesty, we find permission to bring our unmet longings and hard questions into God’s presence. - Promise and timing are different things:
God had promised descendants, but the timing and means were not yet present. Waiting between promise and fulfillment is a frequent human experience. This demonstrates that faith is not simply believing a promise in the abstract; it’s trusting God through the uncertainty and discomfort of waiting, even when immediate circumstances point elsewhere. - Faith involves trust, not the absence of questions:
Abram’s next step, believing God’s word about his future offspring, shows that faith can coexist with doubt. Faith here is a posture: receiving God’s assurance and living in relationship with God despite not seeing the evidence yet. It’s less about a flawless inner certainty and more about anchoring yourself in God’s character and promises.
Here's my prayer for you this week, that like Abram, you will name your reality by giving a voice to the hard facts of your life—unanswered prayers, losses, relationships that hurt and dreams delayed. May you be empowered to honestly engage your faith even in the midst of doubt and uncertainty. May the Lord help you to reframe your waiting period as a season of formation and refinement. I pray that that pause between promise and fulfillment will mature us and cause a shift in our priorities. Let this be so and so it is in Jesus’ name. AMEN!
XOXO,
Lady Abena.