Since I’m speaking for myself, let me just confess that I am a work in progress when it comes to forbearance – tolerating people and making room for their mistakes and errors. I know it might come as a shock to some people who know me quite well because they believe that I have a high-level of tolerance for others. I honestly don’t. My mother on the other hand is a whole vibe and I wish I could be more like her. My mom will see the good in people even when there’s none. I learned a lot from her but it’s still a challenge for me. You’re free to judge me on this one if you’d like to.

There’s a proverbial saying in my culture that “if they do it to you and you don’t show it hurts, they will not stop doing it.” In other words, if you give someone a mile of advantage over you, they will take ten (10) more miles and I have unfortunately been a victim of this hence my intolerance now. I have seen a few errors in life, it seems like the people you show more grace and love to are the ones who usually will cross the lines and do the worst to you. The Holy Spirit has done a tremendous work with me in the area of forgiveness so I am able and quick to forgive, but, my walls go up and I plaster my boundaries in RED ink so you know there will not be another chance to cross over it. It’s my protective instinct because honestly, who wants to get hurt, bruised, betrayed and offended over and over again.

Have you read Matthew 5:38-48 yet? Please do so because I am convicted each time I read it but it’s helping me grow and I believe it will help you too. There’s something about motherhood that enlarges your capacity to tolerate the things you cannot even stomach. Ephesians 4:2 has become my guiding light and with the help of the Holy Spirit, I’m creating a bit more allowance in my life for “repeat offenders.”

Ephesians 4:2 NLT
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.

I pray for you that if you struggle in this area as I do, may the Lord give you strength and grace to forbear. I declare it is so and so it is in Jesus’ name, AMEN!


Lady Abena.